Sometimes, after a night like tonight, I just sit back and think why me, why me? I mean seriously? I feel like I have wasted my whole night doing nothing and being around people who don't give two cents about me. Oh well, what's done is done...now I am watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire with Zach, just seeing him smile makes everything better! :)

A Good Conversation With My Sister

So my little sister called me tonight just to say hi. I really appreciated it. I love my sister so much. Sometimes I feel like three years is a big age gap but at the same time I always have wanted to her to be my best friend. Well tonight, I felt like that. After we had some small talk she got really giddy and started telling me about this guy named Marcus. Well I haven’t met Marcus yet but he thinks my little sister is gorgeous (who wouldn’t), he is 19 and yes Rachel, he is hott. ;) Here is Marcus:

Anyways I just wanted to say that I love you Rachel and I am glad that I guy finally has figured it out and seen what a catch you are. Even if he didn’t, I just want you to remember that you are a beautiful girl and any guy will be the luckiest guy in the world to win you over. I love you and I hope we are always best friends! Have fun this weekend in Atlanta and I will see you next weekend! :) 

Lift Up Your Eyes

Lift Up Your Eyes

I am doing a study of Genesis right now with my focus group girlies and I was studying our materials for tomorrow night and reading James Boice’s Commentary on Genesis when I came across his chapter entitled “Lift Up Your Eyes.” This chapter struck my heart so deep and has inspired me in such a huge way and I just wanted to share some of it with you all. 

First read Genesis 13:14-18 (those are the verses that this is referring to) 

Some background info: we are talking about Abram and Lot and when they have to split up because of their herdsmen quarreling. Abram tells Lot that he can choose where he wants to go and Abram will go the other way (even though Abram is the older and entitled one to choose). This is after Lot chooses Jordan because it looks better than the highlands. The Lord tells him to lift up his eyes….and he blesses him with all the land and the promise of his offspring being many.

There is an incident in Luke 18:18-30 where a young rich man comes to Jesus and asks what he must do to inherit eternal life. You all know the story and if you don’t check it out because it is a cool one. There are some key parts to this story in relevance to Abram’s story though.

1) Jesus tells the disciples that although it is difficult for a rich person to enter the kingdom of heaven, it is not impossible. For “what is possible with men is possible with God.” 

2.) Jesus also tells them this, “I tell you the truth, no one who has left home or wife or brothers or parents or children for the sake of the kingdom of God will fail to receive many times as much in this age and in the age to come, eternal life.”

This is important because Abram had temporarily lost prime real estate in Canaan by giving Lot the first choice in the matter of land. But God came to Abram to say that Abram had abandoned nothing that would not be more than compensated for - both in this life and in the life to come. 

But he would have to do two things: 1)He would have to lift up his eyes and see what God was giving and 2) he would have to walk through the length and breadth of th land and thus possess it piecemeal.

Different Kinds Of Looking 

There is the literal translation in which Lot uses and has a longing or covetous view of the land (Jordan) and then there is the looking that Abram does, which is that of obedience.  As Abram obeyed, the site of surrender became a place of possession through his already growing faith.

This passage of lifting up your eyes speaks to everyone but should be especially encouraging to those who are discouraged and feel like God’s will or the path he wishes you to go is hidden.

When people think like that their eyes are cast down. They are looking at the earth and focusing on their own little problems. They cannot see God, so they suppose God cannot see them. To this God says Look Up! Look at the stars if you are unable to see anything else. Ask, “Who has made all of these? Who named them, remembers them, guides them?” The ponder whether he does not know you and is not able to guide you, you of little faith.

Jesus made the same point on the sermon of the mount. Check it out Matthew 6:28-30

Another thing the Bible tells us to do is to Look up and see God the Father, particularly inprayer. 

Are you weary? Tell God about it. Jesus said, “Ask and it will be given, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you. For anyone who asks receives, he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks, the door will be open” - Matthew 7:7-8. Also look at James 4:2, 1:5, and John 14:13-14.

These verses tell us that God delights to give good gifts to his children. So if we do not have them, the fault does not lie in God. It lies in our failure to lift up our eyes to heaven and ask for them.

We don’t live in a praying age. We live in an age of hustle and bustle, of man’s determination, of man’s confidence in himself and in his own power to achieve things, an age of human organization, and human machinery, and human push, and human scheming, and human achievement, which in the things of God means no real achievement at all. 

What we need is not so much some new organization, some new wheel, but the spirit of the living God in the wheels we already possess.

The third thing we are encouraged to do is lift up our eyes to see Jesus. We as Christians don’t see Jesus in everything and with everything subject to him, because our sin often hinders us in the Christian life. We are so often distracted by other visions and loyalties. Like Peter on the mount of transfiguration (Matthew 17:4).

We live in the midst of a conflicting cacophony of voices. They come from without and within - from the world, the flesh, and the Devil - and one reason why we are so confused and ineffective as Christians is that we listen to them all. The cure for that is to do what Peter was admonished to do - lift up his eyes to Jesus and listen to him only. 

We are also told to lift up our eyes to God’s harvest. Check out John 4:35-36 This is the story of the woman at the well and how she becomes saved. Her reaction was to leave her waterpot - she had forgoteen about lesser things - and returned to the city where she told the people, “Come see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?” (John 4:29) They responded to her invitation and made their way to Jesus in large numbers. 

Jesus taught the disciples by telling them, ” Open your eyes and look to the fields! They are ripe for harvest.” The disciples were blind to the harvest, but the harvest was streaming toward Jesus. They were about to miss it because they were not looking up. They were only thinking about their stomachs. 

The harvest is also ripe today!  It has been ripe ever since Jesus’ ministry here on earth. Are you aware of the moving of the Spirit of God in our time? It is evident in many places: in the cities, on the campuses, throughout the third world. Are you awake to these opportunities? If not you must life your eyes to the harvest and ask God to use you as one of his laborers. 

We do not do it without effort though. It is one by one and with great effort. But though it is often discouraging, those ‘one by ones’ do come and God is honored. Lift up your eyes! It is happening all around you! 

I Wish I Could Sleep...

So I am sitting here on my bed and I want to fall asleep so much, I really do, after last night staying with Zach while he was sick, I really just want sleep. But even though I am back at my place with my warm and cozy bed I just can't sleep. Why you ask? I am worried about Zach for the most part. The other thing is I have a lot on my mind at the moment. Ugggh....I hate this! I just want some peaceful sleep and yet my mind won't stop with all of the what ifs and all the prayer requests in my head. So I guess I am just gonna to lay here in the dark and try to pray myself to sleep...

I Now Appreciate My Mother More Than Ever

My sweet boyfriend got sick last night and has been sick since then. He had a terrible headache all day and then last night he actually got sick and had a fever of almost 102 degrees. I, being his nurse, stayed with him and was up for the majority of the night checking on him, trying to bring his fever down with the fan on, and a cold washcloth on his forehead every half hour or so.

Finally at 6 this morning he took some medicine and it made his fever go down, but just when we thought he was better his fever came back. We are both really tired from lack of sleep, he is really hungry too because he hasn't had anything but water and some soup to eat. We have been laying around all day, watching football and Charlie St. Cloud. But his fever is being very stubborn and not going down. Right now it is 99.8 degrees, but I just don't know what's wrong with him or what to do.

It is now more than ever that I appreciate my mom and moms all over the world. Thank you for staying up countless nights with me when I was sick. For taking my temperature every thirty minutes and doing everything humanly possible to make me feel better. I now know a little more of what it is like and I can never thank you enough for everything you have done. I love you mom.

Please be praying for Zach, since he is still sick. :) Thanks!

Well I am back, on blogger. I switched over to tumblr, but since some of my friends are on here I figured that I could update this one with the same stuff for people on blogger so they can comment and read.

I think it's really funny the last few posts that I put on here. I had had this for a long time but hadn't been inspired to use it until my now boyfriend, but then friend introduced me to his tumblr. I fell in love with him and blogging and now I have 3 blogs on tumblr and this one which I am going to keep up with. Well that's all for now just a little information of what is to come. :)

Dateable

I am reading this book called Dateable: Are you? Are they? by Justin Lookadoo and Hayley Morgan and it is really good...REALLY good. I have not finished it but no more than I have read I would advise anyone to read this no matter if you are in a relationship, about to be, or completely single. It has some serious stuff that could help save people a lot of heartache. So this brings me to this post. I have been in some relationships before and who knows how many I will or will not be in later down the road. So I am starting over starting with this...this is proof.

This book is all about relationships and starts off by talking about how to approach your relationships. The first thing is that you should look at each relationship as if it IS going to end eventually...until you get to the years where marriage is a serious possibility then things change. That way you can appreciate your time with that person and yet not devote your whole life to it. The point is by realizing that and acting accordingly each person can succeed and live with excitement and passion (not romantic passion, but a passion for life). I am gonna start by answering some questions about the relationships I will have in the future.

How do I want to be remembered? When he thinks of me I want him to remember me as a great girlfriend. I want him to know that I am precious and valuable. When it ends, he will not know everything about me. He will not have seen or experienced all that I am. He will leave wanting more.

How will I act to get him to feel that way? I am going to be mysterious. I am going to pace my secret sharing. I am not going to give in sexually. He will not just come in and get what he wants from me. I will protect myself so there will be so much of me he hasn't seen., doesn't know, and hasn't touched. I am going to be cool, fun, and exciting. I will keep doing stuff with my friends. I will try new things. I will not be timid, but I will be confident in who I am. I will most importantly remain true to God and myself.

In closing, I have made lots of mistakes in life in general and with relationships, but I am going at it in a totally different way this time. It will take time and I am going to have to completely trust God, but that's how it should be and as the book says, "The great romancer wants to romance you. He wants to show you the sunsets and give you the falling stars. He wants to give you your dreams, your desires, your destiny." I want to keep my focus on the right person and HIS plan for my life.

When it Rains it Pours

You have heard the saying when it rains it pours and after the past few days I definitely agree with it. We were on our way to visit some family in Florida and our van (my family has a big conversion van) was making some strange pop noise every so often. Well we are on our way, have just gotten gas from a place and are pulling out where there is a very loud pop noise and a terrible squealing sound that followed it. So we pull over since the van would no longer run over 20 mph and decide it is the transmission that has come out.

No fear though we are AAA Gold members so we call them up...but the thing is not only is our van huge but we have a trailer attached as well. So the people say they will come and get us but they wanted to charge us $350 to haul our trailer (which is almost more than we had paid for the trailer to start with!) and the wrecker can only hold two people (there are four of us in our family). So we called the relatives that we we going to go and visit and they came down to get us. To make a REALLY long story short - we waited for the wrecker for 3 hours and yesterday we found out it was the transmission on the van and it is going to cost us.

The thing is this though: God is faithful. He will provide and although the past few days I have been struggling with trusting all of this in His hands. But it is amazing because not only will He take care of us but last night He just gave me such a peace about everything through His word. I will put the verses up here when I get to the hotel. Here are the verses:

Psalms 112:7 He will have no fear of bad news, his heart is steadfast trusting in the Lord.

Proverbs 29:25 Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.

Psalms 56:3-4 When I am afraid I will trust in you. In God whose word I praise, in God I trust, I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?

Today we are going to Orlando to stay at the Gaylord Palms for my sister's acting conference. This is such a big opportunity for her and I am super excited for her. This is her calling and I am hoping that she does well and that God blesses her through this. Prayers are welcomed!

So when it rains it pours, but friends are the umbrellas in life's storms. Ultimately we are children of the maker of the universe and he will protect us. :)

Happy New Year!

After reading something one of my friends wrote I was inspired to not make any "new year resolutions" but to instead make some New Year Commitments, thus implying that I am serious about these things and plan to follow through with them. With that said here I go...

2010 New Year Commitments

1. To develop and maintain a healthy and stronger relationship with my heavenly Father and to "Be like the moon and reflect the Son."

2. To put 100% into the things I do, because anything worth doing is worth doing well.

3. To be more encouraging and kind to others, to show the same grace and forgiveness to them that I wish to receive.

4. To not only work at the rec center but to get in shape and to be healthy.

5. To pursue my dreams and passions and not be fearful of anything "Fear not for I am with you, I am the Lord your God." -Isiah 41:10